The Nature of Parents
I am blessed to have caring parents, and I realize that there are those who do not care. But one thing I notice is that parents tend to do more criticizing and reprimanding than encouraging (at least mine do) I believe the reason for this to be a combination of things. The first is that that is what they have been trained to do throughout the child's short life. The child does something wrong, the parent corrects. The second is that parents wish well for their children and try to keep them them from making the same mistakes. The third is simply that the child is the reflection of the parent. Parents are often judged by the qualtily of their offspring. In this way, we are a sort of "project". Not that this necessarily diminishes the love and concern parents have for us as people, but simply that it is added incentive. Parents are also more keenly aware of our weaknesses (moreso than we think). Now grandparents do not see us as often, so they usually look for the good, and encourage us. They are no longer parents in the sense that they have any responsibility for raising children, in particular us. With honorary parents there is even another factor. I have three, so I have a little bit of experience with this. Honorary parents chose to "adopt" us, and we choose to "adopt" them. So there is a mutual respect and admiration. This fosters the encouragement we receive in this relationship. That is why I think we hear so much chastising from naturla parents, but more encouragement from grandparents and honorary parents. It should be noted that honorary parents almost always supplement natural parents, and almost never replace them.